How would you define a soul mate?

Whether one actually exists or not, almost all of us would say that it’s that person I’m meant to be with. It’s my one true love (not necessarily romantic), possibly across lifetimes, right? Well I don’t disagree. You couldn’t talk me out of the idea that my wife is unquestionably my soul mate.

But is that the only way for soul mates to appear?

I would suggest that a really useful and expansive way of thinking about them is this: Soul mates are a handful of people who play a key role in your spiritual development. People without whom your life would have been fundamentally different.

That means they might hurt you, or block you from something you desperately want, or ruin something you love, or confront you with something you don’t want to see. They might be your nemesis, your enemy, your attacker. They might lure you into doing something stupid or destructive. They are there to help shape your journey in some significant way.

What’s the point of thinking of soul mates this way? Because it reminds you that the darkness, struggle, and pain are part of the design. Bad stuff is included in the plan. Not for its own sake or to be mean, it’s there to focus your attention on an area your spirit wants to address against your ego’s wishes.

It’s too easy to treat the hard parts like things you didn’t deserve. It may sound obvious but the truth is, an awful lot of the time we see adversity as something that shouldn’t have happened. Just because you don’t like it doesn’t mean it went wrong.

If you believe you are here to evolve into higher octaves of spiritual development then it behooves you to embrace the obstacles as well as the opportunities. We imagine the work of the soul will require love, support, and assistance from wonderful people. But it will also require those who will put us in difficult, life changing positions.

What if the bully, the betrayer, the heartbreaker, or the abandoner, was fulfilling a contract on behalf of your soul? Would you be willing to call him or her your soul mate?

This is the kind of Spiritual terrain that I help people navigate. If your Spirit is prompting you to have a conversation like this, I encourage you to get in touch with me.

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